I Wonder

I often like to stop and stare at things and wonder and just think about them… Since becoming a mother I've had less opportunity to do so, and sometimes I feel like it's wasting time when I do have the chance to do it. That's why I'm so glad we've been talking about wonder and awe at church lately, and what better time to stop and wonder about things than at Christmas because of all it's about. Doesn't it blow your mind that God would send His son to us?? Maybe it's different for parents -- I have a different way of thinking now that I have a son. Jesus came and was killed by his people who didn't recognize him, didn't care, didn't notice… I could never do it. It's a crazy kind of love we don't understand. 

Part of the reason Xander wasn't dedicated until he was almost one is because I kept putting it off -- there was this idea in my head that if I gave him up to God officially then he wasn't mine anymore. I feel like I love him too much to give him away… to anyone, even God! Weird, I know, but I spent a good few times praying and crying and wondering about it all but I finally realized Xander already belongs to God and he did before he was born, I'm just so thankful to be lucky enough to be the one who gets to raise him. Alexander was the name I got in a dream when we were thinking of having a baby. It's of greek and dutch origin meaning "defender of men" or "defender of the people". So God named him and has some plans for him I'm sure. I wonder how it will all pan out!

Another thing I wonder about a lot since the beginning of my pregnancy is how Mary felt, not just when the angel came telling her what was going to happen, but how did she feel the whole nine months leading up to the birth of Jesus? Did she get mad at God for morning sickness or labour pains like I did? Did she fall in love with his tiny newborn features when she first held him in her arms? Right now I'm wondering how she dealt with his toddler years! Seriously, though, do you think Jesus had tantrums because Mary didn't let him eat play-doh? (Or whatever the heck they had to play with!!) Did Jesus stress Mary out during "The Wonder Weeks"? I guess she didn't have the app on her phone to tell her which weeks he would be acting up or why… There's a lot to wonder about!! 

So it being Christmas right now, here's a newborn picture to look at in awe and wonder and amazement that God creates such ridiculously cute and tiny and fragile and curious and good-smelling and sleep stealing things. And think about how INSANE it is that He decided to come to earth as one of these!!! Look at those lips and eyelashes and fingernails! God is SO big but this thing is SO tiny! What even?! Why?! Don't even worry though, His thoughts are not ours so we can just keep on wondering… Merry Christmas, He loves you!

Bath time fun

Had fun at LaSalle Park in Burlington shooting these photos of baby E and her big sis! Look at all the fun E had in the bubble bath with her duckies!! Her gorgeous big sis was a lot of fun and all smiles. =) =) =)

M & Family

A week or two ago I had the privilege of doing a family shoot by the lake in Mississauga. Looove seeing how babies and their older siblings interact with each other, M's older half bro J was so friggin cute!! I think I have a soft spot for little dudes, probably because I was in high school when my lil bro was still little... and I'm just a bit nostalgic. Here's a handful of shots of cutie pie M and her beautiful family. (I've heard M is crawling already now so I'm glad we got these before she decided to make blurry photos lol)

A & H at Chinguacousy Park

Chinguacousy Park in Brampton. I can't pronounce it, but I went there with Xander and to take photos of two baby girls he knows.

This shoot taught me a couple lessons- firstly, Xander would not stop craving my attention (He's staying home next time). I think maybe he was a bit jealous since he's used to being the one in front of the camera! Another challenge was photographing baby H who is so excited with life she's moving all over the place!

Baby A was much easier to get in focus but she must have thought I was a weirdo because she would just stare at me and didn't want to hand out her smiles for free. All it took was for her mama to sing The Cat in the Hat. Well of course.. I knew that...

W at Evergreen Brickworks

Last week I visited this sweet place in Toronto, the evergreen brickworks with cutie W and her super cool mama! This little girl was so lovely, she's usually so full of smiles but was giving me serious looks and I learned that the silly sounds I know how to make may only be appreciated by Xander... A good lesson that all babies like different things which only makes sense. Her mama knew best how to get those beautiful smiles out! W's favourite thing to do right now: that silly brrr thing with her lips blowing air!

Mama Life

Xander is almost 7 months and things are getting to be good. He sleeps most of the night and during the day he's pretty much an angel, fussing only when he's in pain from teething. So just when I'm finally over the shock of being a new mom, it's time to start thinking about work again. The sweet thing is Xander gets to help! I've got about a zillion photos of him so far and counting, and also managed to make a few clothes...

As far as inspiration goes I have more than enough from Xander, anyone who works for themselves knows motivation is the hard part! Check back for new stuff soon, and eventually the website will back up and running too. For now here's this:

Being a mom has introduced me to a lot of things I obviously never had thought about before, one being breastfeeding rights. Before deciding to have a baby I assumed I wouldn't even breastfeed at all! I remember feeling afraid of it, thinking it was a bit weird even though it's the most natural thing to do. At first it was tricky. It was tiring, awkward and if we were out in public and he was hungry I was terrified! What if my nursing cover came open? Obviously so embarrassing, right? It shouldn't be!

There was a thing that happened where a women was nursing her baby in a Victoria's Secret and she was told to leave... what are boobs for again..?? I started doing some research on breastfeeding in public and organizations promoting it and realized I was a little angry that I've been given this idea that bottle feeding in public is more appropriate in our society. There are portraits and paintings of women all throughout history breastfeeding their babies and I'm not really sure where the point was that it became wrong to feed your baby openly.

Plan to see more breastfeeding photos when my website comes back, but for now here's a self portrait with the little guy.

Please check out these sites for reference: 

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/06/17/victorian-breastfeeding-photo_n_3442872.html

http://www.infactcanada.ca/breastfeeding_rights.htm

http://www.lllc.ca/